Breathe

I wrote this while sitting on the bus last week.

Just a little bit slower, yes just a little bit slow it is all moving today - and that white snow covers the dirt filled streets just as Christ's death covers my sin.

This is weird this morning, my like is such as a movie. Things move slow and nothing seems real once you sit and examine it. What's truth and what is not truth? In a movie it is hard to tell, its the same with my life right now. Its not impossible, but it is getting there. In movies to keep viewers interested they must be changing the plot constantly and that is much like my life it feels. Right when I change for the good things goof up. Right when things seem to become well, I learn that they are not at all.

Who am I at all right now, I sit here wanting to complain but when really I have no grounds to complain. No grounds to complain - meaning that no one has died and I still have a roof over my head. I have food and sheets to cover my back when the shadows lurk. This is life and I never live it out the way I wish I could.

To stand in the Mcdonals and to look into people's eyes, one can see more then they would think. The eyes are the windows of the soul. And to look into those are a journey, to look into someone's soul and just try to imagine what they are thinking and to see what they are dealing with. What is that person dealing with? My problems are most likely miniscule compared to theirs.

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Now writings from today? Its been a good weekend, really. I have got to think a lot, and thats good lately. I have been getting ready to lead worship this evening at church. Its quite an interesting place to put yourself in. From a humanly perspective - Its putting yourself up on a platform waiting for critisizm. When I sit and read that, Its a horrible thing but its true in some churches. I think my church can be that way sometimes. From a heavenly perspective - really it is beautiful. Who am I singing for when I lead in the front of the church, in my head... I am singing for no one but Christ himself.
Anyways, that all has a negative vibe to it, but I am excited for the opportunity.

Anyways. thats just some thoughs.
I'll post an update sometime soon.